


A Little Bird (got7)

by Twisted_PDnim



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Established Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung | Jr., Fantasy, Got7 otp, Loneliness, M/M, Melodrama, Mild Language, Minor Mark Tuan/Jackson Wang, Mystery, OTP Feels, Other, Thriller
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-01-26 01:08:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12545420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twisted_PDnim/pseuds/Twisted_PDnim
Summary: I often asked myself, can I fly like a bird?and here I am now.I've failed"Why did you do It? Why did you have to leave me here alone"I don't exist anymore. I'm aloneInspired by the flight log trilogy.





	1. Arrival

It was darkness,

all around, there was only darkness.

The sound of fire crackling, A hollow almost shallow and thick breathing follow by the sound of footsteps pacing in different directions.

The sound of deafening mutters that slowly and discreetly becoming louder. A Flash of light piercing the lids of the young man who lays emotionless on the cold dusty ground.

_“He is breathing”_ the stranger voice echoic. 

" _quickly! move him to the truck_ ”

the movement began to waken the young man sense, his eyes slowly opening,

“sir! He waking up!” said the blurry figure above him. 

“Son what is your name?” asked the blurred out figure. 

the young man flickered eyes trying to focus his eyesight but struggled his vision was blur out, unable to recognize the face in front of him.  

"young man do you remember your name?" another figure asked but this time the voice sounded like it belong to woman. 

The young man struggles to speak without feel like he couldn't breathe, “pa...nyoung…"

 the two blurry figure look at each other for a moment, “do you know anyone we can contact?”  asked the paramedic sitting across from him. 

The young man blinked slowly while staring at the paramedic who was checking his pulse and heart rate, His eyes half open, his body numb and unable to move a single muscle except his eyes that are straining to see what is around him, trying desperately to adjusted themselves. 

A voice echoed “young man can you hear me?” the young man slowly look at the paramedic weakling before losing focus. 

The sound of a muffled siren and murmur voice filled the young man ear, his eyes becoming heavy as the feeling of the truck rattling from the fast speed as it drove through the streets of Seoul.

The paramedic asks the same question again but this time moving closer to the young man, the look of exhaustion was given his eyes blank and lifeless.

“sir! His heart rate And his oxygen levels are dropping!” a woman shouted,

“quickly, the oxygen mask now!” the man shouted, a hint of panic in his voice.

 

The voices and the sound of the siren slowly faded into the depth of city light of Seoul while the sound of his own heartbeat thumping in an uneven pace. the young man vision slowly darken until a voice was heard “come on son, you have stay awake! talk to me, come on" 

the young man mind fighting to stay conscious as the paramedic continued to talk to him. 

"tell me your name. what is your name?" 

deep breath..."pa-" exhaled 

deep breath "rk-" exhaled

"Ji-" deep breath "Nyoung" exhale. 

”that it, just like that, come on tell your name again" the paramedic continued to ask question but just like the young man eyes shut and  everything went mute, everything went black.

 

 

The sound of the wind howling through the branches of snow covered trees that stood firmly on the snow-covered ground. It was a forest in the mountains and all around was clear pure white snow. The rays of the burning sun managing to peek through slowly drifting the clear pure white clouds that tried to block its light. shivering inhale and a trembling body that laid flat on his back on the cold snow. Jinyoung eyes pop open, his body automatically sitting up on its own while gasping in a harsh and rasped breath of the cold thin air. Tears form and the cold snow burning his delicate skin and the harsh wind blowing through the lock of his silk black hair. Jinyoung looked around to find only a field of snow, jinyoung wrap his arm around his knees, burying his face into them. His breath hitched as his shoulder trembled his tear struggled to escape as the cold wind would freeze them. Jinyoung slowly lifted his head the moment the warmth of the sun rays fell upon his shoulders. Jinyoung pushing himself up onto his feet and took in sharp cold breath of air before taking a step forward, He was bare foot so the snow burnt the bottom of his feet’s.

“where am I?”  he whispered

_‘Jinyoungie’_

A discrete voice was heard through the whistling sound of the wind.

“Hyung..” Jinyoung uttered , looking all around himself but no one was in sight

A sudden panic and rush of anxiety racing through his veins cause him to run, Jinyoung ran through the trees following the voices that he knew very well. he stops the icy air making it difficult to breathe. 

_'jinyoungie!'_

Jinyoung look to his left, looking at the direction where the sound of his name was coming from, “Mark!” he shouted harshly his voice cracking; his feet moving on their own slowly than quickly pick up their pace. 

Jinyoung halts, nearly stumbling among the burning cold snow before turning around. he gulps down the dry thick knot that was stuck in the center of his throat.   

_'actor park jinyoung!'_

Gripping the front of his navy-blue button up shirt, Jinyoung eyes tremble while he followed the voice that called out his name in a echoic shallow tone, “J-J-Jackson” tears gather in the center of his eyes. 

_'Wang gae'_

“JACKSON!” Jinyoung cried out running like his life was on the line.

_'Jinyoung hyung'_

another familiar voice was heard from the right causing jinyoung to halt and turn, 

the voice called his name again followed by a laughter that cause Jinyoung to walk forward with a sad like smile formed. Jinyoung love that laugh he love it so much because it was those type of laughter that bring a smile to someone the type of laugh that make a rainy day better a laugh that sound like their out of breath or laughing while they have hiccups. Jinyoung knew that laugh anywhere. 

“young-youngjae!” jinyoung cried out tears running down his cold pale cheeks. 

Jinyoung breathing was uneven the freezing air that travel through his air pips cause an aching sharp pain in his lungs. Jinyoung stomp his feet harder against the snow ignoring the now numbing feeling under his feets. Jinyoung did everything in his will to pick up his speed, he was desperate to find those voices.

_“Jinyoung-ah babo!”_ Jinyoung shifted to the left and slowly yet tiredly running his voice cracking and shuddering

“yug-" he was short of breath "yugyeom-ah!” he growled

_“Jinyoungie hyung!”_

"Ba-" no sound left jinyoung lips, aggravated jinyoung raked his hair gulping as he shouted agonizingly "BamBam!" while rushing towards the voice.

_“yah nyoungie ”_

 Jinyoung stop, this time the familiar voice was closer than the other. Jinyoung stood freeze for a second before looking around again in hope to see him.

“J-Jaebum hyung...” jinyoung smiled vanish as there was no one there.

falling to his knees losing every strength in his body jinyoung let out a cry so painful so saddening that type of cry were it hard to breath, the kind that tighten your chest and it feel like someone gripping you by the neck.  

_'jinyoungie'_

Jinyoung lifted his head, "mark hyung" 

_"Wang gae~"_

pulled himself up and off his knees he gulped "p-park gae!" 

_“haha~ Jinyoung hyung”_  

"y-youngjae" he sob, his feet struggling to move.

_'hyung! come on man'_

jinyoung losing feeling in his knees causing him stumble but jinyoung didn't stop instead continued to get up and walk "BamBam!" jinyoung cries; picking up his speed.

  _“Jinyoungie babo!”_  

he running faster from left to right than turn around then back again. 

_“ Jinyoungie hyung!”_

 Jinyoung cries endlessly as the voice of his friends continued to echo in the empty cold air all round him while he continued to run breathlessly in hope in finding them.

“Mark! Jackson! Youngjae! Yugyeom! BamBam! JaeBum!” Jinyoung cried desperately Suddenly without notice he trips over the rot of the tree and rolls down a steep hill. the harsh hit against the cold icy ground causing him so much pain as he continued to hit and the sound of his name being called slowly started fading away. The moment Jinyoung body hit the floor caused the young man to black out but he wasn’t unconscious, Jinyoung could still hear his own desperate out of rhythm breathing and the ocean waves crashing onto the shore.

 

 

_“I’ve often asked myself… can i fly like a bird?”_

Jinyoung awakens from the cold ocean waves crashing against him. The feeling of the warm sand felt against his palm and in between his fingers as the water continue to wash up shore. Jinyoung pulls himself up on his knees as his hand rake through the moist sand beneath him. Glancing vaguely at his hand as if he couldn't believe that those were in fact his own two hands.

 

_“nothing….”_

Jinyoung eyes trembling, his red lips quiver and his shoulder slouched forward.

_“I've failed…”_

tears began to fall

_“I don't exist anymore”_

Jinyoung stared at ground as the waves pulled him into the ocean. Jinyoung took deep breath when suddenly he felt short out of breath, his chest felt tight almost like if someone was pressing against it. Jinyoung took in another deep sharp breath of air, trying his hardest to stay calm but everything started moving and tilting. Another breath.

A sharp deep ringing pierces his ear drums followed by his chest jerking upwards and his eyes popped open and all around him stood two people in a blue gown and a blue hat with blue face mask that cover their nose and mouth area allowing only their eyes to be shown. Jinyoung laid in a hard bed in a white room and a bright light beaming down on him.

_He's alive…._


	2. Turbulence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i remember   
>  in water   
> i was trapped

"ya!" youngjae hollered, his loud voice echoed in the background.

 

"are you out!?" Asked Jackson

 

"Yeah, I'm out!" said Youngjae, tossing himself over the airplane seat.

 

Jackson rushing over to his side with a camera in his right hand recording every moment of youngjae silliness.Jackson then move over towards the sleeping bambam and capture a glimpse of his peacefully resting face. The camera quickly shifted to yugyeom who is sitting next to bambam with a mischievous look on his face. Yugyeom snickered at the camera, pulling out what look like a black marker and begins to draw on bambam face. After a few minute or so,  bambam was awaken by the loud sound of Jackson high pitched laughter. Shooting up from his seat, bambam look at yugyeom who crawled back up in his own seat, a small smirk 

Formed on yugyeom face as he pointed at Jackson. Bambam turns to look at Jackson with a confused look. Jackson shrugged his shoulders trying to hold back the his laugh but fails. BamBam, quickly grabs the small purple pillow and attempts to hit Jackson,

"don't hit me too hard!" Jackson shouted as he continue to record while running away. 

 

Bambam throw the pillow and misses and hit Mark, who was sitting  alone on the other side daydreaming so peacefully. Mark looks up and searched for the culprit who hit him and bug him from his daydreaming. Everyone eyes look away to the other side acting as if they had no idea what just happen, everyone expect JB who was next to Mark at the moment. Mark grab the same pillow and smacked JB with it, startling him as he was reading a book. Jaebum unaware of what just happened still grab another small purple pillow and smack Mark in return. Mark dodged JB causing him to hit youngjae, Youngjae shouted and flings his pillow towards JB. With a slight move to side the pillow flew past him and swatted yugyeom in the face. BAMBAM pointed and laugh at yugyeom causing him to get flushed; yugyeom grab a pillow and started beating bambam with it who was still laughing. Mark flung another pillow again and still missed JB and hit jackson. Jackson shouted then runs towards mark and began to hit him with a pillow JB joining in followed by Youngjae who smack JB instead. BAMBAM ran behind and swatted jackson knocking him off balance and landing onto a seat. Yugyeom began to hit jackson with a pillow followed by bambam hitting yugyeom and youngjae and Mark who team up against JB. laughter and cheers filled the plane and little screams of pain from Jackson overreacting and shouting and pillows flying through the air liven up the room. 

 

 A flight attendant slide open the red curtain that separate the boys area from the piloted area and made her way down the small narrow path pushing the food cart in front of her. The flight attendant smile while glancing over at the other 6 boys then averted her attention towards the raven  haired boy with pitch black eyes deep and mysterious and fade pink lips. The flight attendants offered a drink to the boy who sat alone by the small oval shaped window and stared blankly out of it. Jinyoung pull off one of his ear buds and look at the woman who tapped his shoulder.  She smiled while offering him a drink, jinyoung notice the tray in her hand that had water bottle and a juice box and nuts. His eyes form a half moon as he offered a brief small and bow of his head slightly, gesturing  with his hand that he was fine and didn't want anything at the moment. 

 

The flight attendant up straight and place the tray back onto the cart. Jinyoung watched as she did so then glance over at the 6 boys who were shouting happily and loudly that even his music couldn't tone them out completely. Jinyoung chuckled as he enjoy the view of his fellow members laughing so happily. it brought him peace to see them so joyful and enjoying their youth. all though it can get annoying at time like youngjae sudden loud singing to yugyeom and bambam random outburst, from jackson loud voice and laughter that can be heard across the world to JB ranting and mark yelling at the maknae for god knows what. It still brought jinyoung some type of comfort, it was better than being alone in the quiet.

A Sudden dinging was heard causing jinyoung to avert his eyes from his friends and at the flashing yellow signal with a picture of a seat belt on it. Jinyoung look back at his friends who were still playing around and unbuckles his seatbelt and attempt to get up but the flight attendant advice him to stay seated. Jinyoung did as he was told but his friends not sitting down in their seat worried him. Jinyoung try to get back up but once again the flight attendant prevented him on doing so and pushed him back into his seat.

 

The airplane began to tremble followed by a red almost orange light flickering as the airplane shook more rapidly the chair shaking roughly and the emergency face mask fell from the ceiling of the plane. A sudden heavy pressure fell upon jinyoung chest as the plane spiraled down. The gravitational pressure push Jinyoung against his seat. Jinyoung gripped on tightly onto armrest of his chair and look over at his friends who were still laughing and joking around. How could it be that they were not phased by the fact that the plane is crashing down? A beeping sound rang in jinyoung ear follow by the laughter of his member and the flight attendant continuing to tell him “sir, please stay in your seat” jinyoung swear it felt like his heart was being pumped and the air in his lung was being pulled out of them. Jinyoung shut his eye tightly letting only the sound of the plane ripping through the sky and emergency alarm ringing followed by laughter fade away.

 

_ "make it stop..." _

 

The sound of the wind howling and whistling , A cold brush of air felt against his skin and the sound of his breathing shallow and raspy as his heart beats unsteady. Jinyoung opened his eyes and all round was a thick mist.

 

_ 'How did I get here?’ _

 

_  “I remember….” _ he thought

 

_ “in water...”  _

Jinyoung grips the collar of his shirt gasping for air and shutting his eyes 

 

_ "I was trapped..." _

 

And just like that it all went silent. Until a deafening sound of something heavy falling deep into the ocean submerged.  

.

A sudden rush of anxiety and the feeling of not enough oxygen to breath surged within Jinyoung the moment he open his eyes and found himself trapped inside a glass box that was being fill up with water. Jinyoung look around looking to find a way to stop the water but instead it cause him to feel breathless and nervous almost anxious and tense, he was panicking. The began water raised above his waist and Jinyoung pound his fist against each side of glass walls from left to right to front and back from above and below to all around he was desperate. But nothing work not a crack was made or a scratch was left he was stuck and running out of air. Jinyoung eyes widen when suddenly a figure was spotted in the near distance. Jinyoung squint his eyes trying to make out the blurry figment.

  
  


Meanwhile A young boy with light brown hair dress in a baggy black long shirt with a white line going down on his side and black long baggy shorts to match stood in front of what look like a small cage. The young boy pulled open the small caged door and stuck His hand inside. Reaching in carefully he grabs what look like a small sky blue bird. The young boy take out his hand and gently cupped both hands together then slowly opens them and exposing the little bird.

 

"Youngjae!" Jinyoung shouted mentally, hitting the glass walls in a frantic panic as the water reached his neck.

Youngjae look up almost as if he heard jinyoung, then quickly look back at his hands. youngjae kneel down placing the back of his hands against the ground then slowly and carefully releasing the bird. Youngjae stood back up  looked around then walk away into the white space full of trees.

Jinyoung slammed his fist repeatedly making no damage what so ever onto the glass walls While shouting and mouthing out youngjae name over and over. The water rises high, already passed his neck. Jinyoung tilted his head upwards struggling to breathe and his heart rate beating rapidly and The little hope Jinyoung had left slowly began to drift away. finally Jinyoung give up and let his body sink to the bottom of tank, wrapping his arms around his knees, pulling them closer to his chest and closing his eyes Jinyoung began cherish the little breath of oxygen he had left as the tank filled up completely. 

 

The sudden sound of footsteps approaching and A heavy metal hammer being dragged against the ground began. The footsteps got louder and faster the heavy metal hammer scratching against the ground was ended when a finally stomp on the ground was made and a heavy swash sound ripped through the air.

Jinyoung eyes open mouthing out _ ‘Youngjae’ _  Jinyoung quickly shut his eyes tightly and wait for the hard impact of the hammer.

 

Jinyoung take in a ragged breath of air; his eyes shot open and the sound of the plane rumbling and flashes of red light still flickering followed by the sound of each member gasping and shouting suppressed and the flight attendant still  hold Jinyoung down as she put a oxygen mask on him. Jinyoung eyes tremble  the palm of his hands sweating while he felt his whole body shake aggressively with plane. Suddenly the airplane power system shutdown and the rush of the sudden drop and the pressure that lifted as the plane spiraled down as Jinyoung glance over at his friends and the sight of their body hitting against airplane ceiling triggered this anxiety within Jinyoung. The beeping and rumbling sound of the plane goes mute, a flash of a memory of his member flying while he alone again the thick mist surrounding him as he watches them fly away. Jinyoung begins to run as the wind howls. 

 

Jinyoung find himself standing at the edge of a building and all around him was a foggy mist. Staring up at the sky with a look of  despair and longing. Jinyoung eyes expression this type of pain, like a lost child who looking desperately for their mother who abandons them years ago yet still search for them in hopes they'll come back. Jinyoung close his eyes and holds his breath as the the cold air blows against his skin as he slowly lean forward. then it happen,

 

Desperate Gasps of air as Jinyoung wakens with a oxygen mask cover his nose and mouth area and paramedics next to him. Jinyoung turns his head from side to side analyzing all around him. all he saw was broken parts of the airplane, cars flip over and fire, small pits of fire. Jinyoung slowly lift him himself up a bit as he slowly rolls to his side. Jinyoung eyes continued to wonder but  what he was searching for was nowhere in sight, not a single one, none of them were spotted. Only the camera, a small gray camera that played.

 

_ "Are you out!" _

 

_ "Yeah I'm out!"  _

 

Jinyoung eyes became water a lump caught in his chest as  he struggled to stand up but with every power in his body he pulled himself up onto his feets and limp over towards the camera.

 

"young man you have to stay still" said a paramedic.

 

But jinyoung ignore her and continued to walk away and just as he was about to crouch down and grab the camera he hears a laughter. 

 

This laughter was such a simple laughter yet unique; it was contiguous.

 

Jinyoung batts his eyes and moved closer towards a broken piece of the side of the airplane but stop mid way taking in what little courage he had left and began to approach it. When suddenly he felt a cold touch on his shoulder and heard a whispers

 

_ "find me" _

 

Suddenly jinyoung loses feeling in his knees and falls to the ground. Gripping tightly onto his chest, taking in short rasped breath while his vision blurs and the colors all round fade.

Jinyoung hang his head and stared at the ground beneath him as tears running down his cheeks. the room tilts and fades in and out but just before jinyoung light went out a voice whispers.

  
  


_ "and save me" _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i'm doing it backwards lol but anyways i hope you all are enjoying it.   
> again sorry for my bad grammar im working on it ^.^


	3. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "To be able to fly like a bird, to be free that all I wanted..."
> 
> “to fly...”
> 
> he mouth two words 
> 
> “with you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Part a bit long but i hope you like it. remember to comment below  
> Thank you for reading this far too ^.^

  


The peaceful sound of the wheels rolling against the ground and the wind blowing as the van ripped through it. The sunlight was bright and the sky had not a single cloud to block the radiant sun from shining its rays of enlightenment. Music playing slightly in the background and small giggles of laughter erupted.  


_"I~ love you~”_ Youngjae harmonized _“baby~ I~”_ he break into a giggle as Jackson join into his harmonization.  

Jackson voice nearly cracking as he tried to hit youngjae high note. Youngjae flashes a simple smile as he continued to play on his cell phone, he given up on trying to sing with jackson. 

"I don't have money to buy meat~” said jackson in a serious tone of voice. 

Youngjae smile slowly vanishing. He knew where this was going and paid no mind and continued to look for music to play on his phone as he slightly shook his head. 

“I want to buy it if i can” he adds. 

JB smirk slightly staring out the side window then back at the road as he continued driving. Silently judging Jackson for always saying the same thing and never buying them meat when he can. A couple of minute pass and Jackson reach over for the camera and began to record.

"look at the camera~, hey, hey, hey, hey." said Jackson excitingly

A mocked laughter escaped "Park~ Jinyoung~" Jackson said in a playful tone, while film the famous Park Jinyoung.

Jinyoung turn to look at Jackson and gave him this look that judged Jackson yet appreciated him; jinyoung flash a small grin. After a few minute of filming Jinyoung, Jackson turn the camera towards  yugyeom who started acting cute in return. 

“Oh~~” Jackson pretend to be phased, “stop acting cute, it’s hard to look at you” he remarked no second later. 

Which cause youngjae to laugh.  

Jackson then turn the camera around towards himself "say cheese everybody!" 

Jinyoung wraps his arm around Jackson shoulder while mark scooted over closer to them and youngjae popping in from the back seats while yugyeom watched them. Mark opened his eyes wide as he bite his lower lip jinyoung grinning from ear to ear as youngjae continued laughing for who know what reason as he stared at the camera. Jackson moved close to yugyeom, wrapping his arm around his shoulder as he pulled yugyeom in close. The both of them lowly screeching in pretentious excitement.

Throughout the drive Jackson film each member having fun and acting weird. He Filmed youngjae weird shoulder dancing which he then told him to stop embarrassing himself and toss a pillow at youngjae. Youngjae with a shocked look grab the pillow and flung it at jackson yugyeom joined and smack him.  

“Don’t throw it to hard! Don’t throw it to hard!” jackson hollered 

Yugyeom being right beside jackson end up hitting the camera. Jackson lucky didn't drop it until he was caught off guard by jinyoung who throw a pillow at him. Jackson went back to filming yugyeom after turning it off for like a good 10 seconds or so. yugyeom look at the camera and place his index finger in front of his own lips signaling everyone to be quiet.  

“Shh. lets draw it quickly~” he whispers. 

Mark smiled and waited on yugyeom with anticipation as youngjae signaled a okay with his hand. JB watched from the rearview mirror smiling at his fellow member being dorks. Jackson move close to yugyeom filming him from over his shoulders. Mutters and giggles filled the air as the camera focused on the sleeping bambam who faces was being drawn on by kim yugyeom.

“More more more, draw more” Jackson encouraging the younger lad to draw more stuff on bambam,

Jinyoung moved closer his curiosity winning the best of him as he hovered over Jackson's shoulder and chuckled. Once yugyeom finish Jackson zoom out from bambam then zoom back into the sleeping lad face chuckling quietly amused by yugyeom creativity.  

“he has another face on his left cheek” he comments

“Bam~ our bambam~” jackson hollered as he nudged bambam while still recording. 

The sleepy boy slowly sit up, confused and totally out of it while he look around. Youngjae loud half laughter erupts follow by marks and jinyoung and yugyeom  and JB silent laughter. Jackson begin to cooed at bambam who was still half asleep but slowly coming into it. 

“What a fun time~” said Jb in a whisper.

Moment later Jackson shouted in joy “Let’s go!” 

Jinyoung stared out the window his arm cross in front of him, the smile still displayed on his face. mark inserted one of his earbuds into jinyoung ear so that he could listen to the music that played on his phone. Jinyoung didn't flinch as he allowed Mark to do so and enjoyed the song that Mark has been wanting him to listen too. Everyone smiled happy as the van continued to move along the quiet road as laughter filled the silence.  youngjae took the camera and started filming; He record JB driving and Yugyeom smiling creepy at the camera then shut it off afterwards. Mark moved over towards jackson and the two younger lads, leaving jinyoung alone. Jinyoung lean against the window while listening to music, his eyes slowly closing as the warmth of the sun rested against his skin, slowly and peacefully jinyoung drift away into a silent slumber.

  


  


_The whistling sound of the cold wind blowing through the thick foggy mist, foots stomping onto the floor follow by the sound of short raspy breaths._

_ "Where am I?" _

_ Jinyoung look around trying his hardest to see pass the heavy fog that block his vision but there was no use. Jinyoung began to run again while he tried to figure out where he was heading; he stop his breathing became harder as the mist fell heavier.  Jinyoung began to wonder if it was it all a dream, his friends laughing, JB driving, Jackson singing and yugyeom drawing on bambam face and the little blue bird that sat on JB arm too _

_ “There was a bird?”  _

_ “was it all really just some dream?”   _ Jinyoung shook his head and started running again.

_ "this can't be true I know this can't be true"  _ he thought to himself. _ “This isn't real! I want to wake up!”  _

_ Out of nowhere everything around J inyoung starts turning white and a sharp piercing sound pierces jinyoung ears followed by a rumbling deafening sound. _

Jinyoung wakens: J inyoung open eyes, his vision was a bit hazy and his eyelids slightly heavy. Jinyoung eyes meet the ceiling then quickly meets a young man in a long oversized yellow hoodie who was leaning against the window reading a book. He look peaceful and gently the way his blonde hair rested perfectly against his forehead his soft skin and faded pink small lips. Jinyoung never notice how beautiful Mark truly is.  Mark looks up from his book and over to jinyoung flashing him a simple smile, Jinyoung just laid there for a few second and stared at mark like if he was trying to cherish and memories every feature of his.

“This set will break into pieces haha.”

The silence is broken and jinyoung avert his eyes towards the voices. Jinyoung sat up on the bed he was in and watch as the others laughed. There was this hint of sadness in jinyoung eyes this longing feeling and resentful look on jinyoung face as he looked at Jackson and youngjae who were sitting on a small worn out couch. Jackson had his leg over youngjae lap as he recorded the younger lad wiggling his arms while Bambam and yugyeom we’re busy playing darts.

Jackson rose from his seat and filmed youngjae from a different angle, cheering him on as he did different poses. Jackson step on the couch as he was trying to get a better shot of bambam and yugyeom playing darts while nearly slipping. Thankfully the wall was there to stop his fall. 

Moments later the camera was on yugyeom who had on a pair of shades and wiggled around in them.

“What are you doing?” question jackson 

But yugyeom didn't respond instead continue to dances in place as he followed the camera. Jackson move on over to JB who sat down peacefully next to a small cage and on his hand sat a baby blue bird. Jackson was amazed at how calm JB was with it and how the bird was comfortable on JB hand. Like it was normal for it, as if it was its home.  

“Oh _JB~_ ” 

JB smirk as he carefully moved his hand slight forward showing the bird off “its a baby bird” 

“ _Ahgase~~_ ” the voice behind the camera sang monotone yet slightly high tone. 

“Wow,wow,wow,wow!” Jackson chants as JB careful guides the baby bird onto his hand where it soon took it seat on his index finger.

Jackson cheered as he held the camera with his other free hand smiling happy while trying to keep his face away from the bird: He was both scared and excited. Meanwhile Mark stared out the window his elbows resting on the ledge of the window frame as he use them to keep his upper body up. 

“ _Markeu~~_ ” Jackson calls out cutely 

Mark turn to face Jackson who was already filming him. Mark turn around completely and started striking a pose or two. Jackson praising Mark as he film him from different side. Jinyoung smiled as he watched the Jackson film mark with sun-glasses enjoying the sweet smile they both expressed so naturally. Jinyoung eyes did as Jackson camera lens and filming every little second, capturing everything and every little detail. He watched as Jackson filmed yugyeom play the acoustic guitar and bambam ruffling his hair as he stared at his own reflect in the mirror all while sitting in the same spot, holding onto the pillow on his lap. Jackson moved in front of jinyoung his camera still recording. Jinyoung eyes followed the camera that slowly moved around him slightly.  Jackson started recording himself and the other member who where next time him. Yugyeom holding onto mark and bambam to which mark held onto youngjae and while youngjae held onto Jackson as they fell onto the couch cheering so happily. 

And there it was again that feeling of emptiness inside jinyoung as he watch them play. The smile on yugyeom face as he rolled bambam around on the floor and the cute giggle that escaped Mark lips as he straddled himself over yugyeom back. The sweet sound that came from the acoustic guitar that youngjae strummed as jackson arm rest over his shoulders. All of it brought this unfamiliar feeling to jinyoung. Not jealousy nor envy, no this feeling of _missing something_. That feeling you get when you look at an old video of the good time and you miss it, you miss the people in it but you don’t talk to them any more because _they're gone_ or out of your life. That longing feeling and the ache in your heart. That what jinyoung felt as he watched them play. Jinyoung look to his side to find his own reflection looking right at him from the full body mirror. It all felt surreal; jinyoung stared deeply at the mirror, his eyes becoming soft and lonely. He only saw his own reflection, just him sitting on the bed, no one else in the background. 

_ “Am i still dreaming?” _

_ The sound of the wind blowing and the white fluffy cloud moving. The fresh breeze, he dreaming he flying again. _

Jinyoung opened his eyes to find himself still in the van leaning against the window like he was before falling asleep. Jinyoung sat up and look out the window to see yugyeom outside throwing what seem to be a baseball at youngjae who caught it  while Mark who was sitting on the rooftop of the detachable part of a SUV filming something. JB was using his bike around the field smiling like if he had just learn how to use a bike. Meanwhile on the other side jackson was filming bambam shoot hoops and mark who would pretend to fall back on the rooftop while secretly filming jb riding his bike. 

"wow wow!" bambam and yugyeom holler in unison.

"youngjae! Youngjae!" Jackson shouts excitedly

Jinyoung turn to look at youngjae who is suddenly levitating off the ground. Mark stood up on his feet still on the rooftop of the van and started filming youngjae along with Jackson.

"are you okay?" asked mark

"is this a magic show?" question Jackson

While Youngjae stares at his glove and watches as the ball fell out of his glove and straight down to the floor. It was clear that it wasn’t gravity's fault. Suddenly Jackson feels his body being lifted “me too me too me too! I’m flying!” he exclaims while filming his feet. Yugyeom and bambam point at Jackson from the ground as mark was wondering the hell was going. 

“Mark!” Jackson calls for his attention, “i’m flying” he laugh. 

Mark levitate up next as he jump off of the van followed by bambam who jumping up to dunk the basketball but he didn't fall back down he continue to fly up:soaring through the sky. Yugyeom running after him he spread his arm and slowly began to take off with his eyes closed feeling the rush in his blood. JB was resting in bed when suddenly his body was felt off the bed and the blue bird flew around him. before anyone notice they all began to fly into the sky and toward the clouds hovering above trees and house and flying next to birds. It was all like a dream but it felt so real, it was thrilling like roller coaster ride. It was that feeling you get when the roller coaster is going up slowly the sound of the wheels and the click like locking sound that comes after signaling that it stopped and your palms are sweating and your heart is pumping  and your breathing become heavy. that one thrilling blood racing heart pounding moment When it drops and roller coaster take off full speed, it felt just like that only less suffocating.

Jinyoung watched as his friends were flying so freely, so happily like the birds in the sky.  He felt trapped like a bird without its wings or locked in a cage. He wanted to fly too, he wanted to be free like a bird. To soar through the sky, to feel the wind against his skin, to feel that sudden thrill throughout his body. To be happily like them to be up there  _ with them in the sky _

The cold air,  The sound of the howling wind,

  


_ I often wonder… _

  


_ I can fly like a bird? _

  


_ And here i am now _

_  
_

he gulps; Jinyoung breathed in deeply  as he slowly open his eyes, standing on the ledge of the high building as he look out into the foggy mist. Exhaling harshly as the view was outstanding yet terrifying but comforting all together. His eyes shook, his red lips trembled while looking down, the fog was too thick it, making it difficult for him see anything; Not even his friends.  Jinyoung tilt his head back allowing the air to blow against his skin, Jinyoung close his eyes and spread his arm open, taking one step forward as he whisper.

_ "To be able to fly like a bird, to be free that all I wanted..." _

_ “to fly...” _

_ he mouth two words  _

_ “with you…”   _

and with that jinyoung let himself go, falling straight down rapidly when suddenly it felt like time stop and he stop falling. Jinyoung open his eyes when he heard Mark’s giggle, smiling at jinyoung, this feeling of relief was present in jinyoung heart. Jackson came along smiling so widely along with youngjae who was a couple of inch away from jackson. Jinyoung turn to his left where bambam and yugyeom and lastly JB appeared in front of him the moment jinyoung body turn around. Suddenly Mark was pulled back up into the sky along with the other except for him, or to be more exact, time turn and Jinyoung continued to fall. Jinyoung breathing became difficult as his heart skipped beat after beat. Jinyoung stretched out his arm in front of himself, tears slipping as They became unreachable,  Jinyoung hope that someone would grabs him, to save him. He should have know, the fact that they were floating while he was falling. Jinyoung closed his eyes the moment they got to far for him to see them and waited for the hard impact that would come when he hit the ground. Accepting his fate. 

_ I’ve failed _

_  
_

Jinyoung gasped his eyes shot open, his body jolting up from the mattress. Jinyoung sat there taking in the moment as he tried to take his breath and ease his heart. Placing his hand on his chest as he Looked around the room while adjusting his vision and analyzing his surrounding. The room he was in was empty only a small tv hang from the wall in front of him and a single chair next to a heart tracking machine.  Jinyoung slides off the bed, his feet touching the cold floor causing them to jerk slightly before standing up and walks over towards the sliding door and opens it. The narrow halls and tiled floor, the yellow white pastel grey colored walls and the swinging long doors that lead to another hall way followed by the smell of plastic rubber and sanitizer that filled the air. Jinyoung look at his reflection from the mirror on his side that was on the wall in the room he was in. He was in a hospital gown.

  


_"how did I get here?"_ Jinyoung question.

  


Jinyoung took a couple of steps forward searching for something he himself wasn't so sure about. 

“Oh Hello Mr. Park, I’m need you to stay in bed, okay?” said a nurse that was walking by. 

Jinyoung look confused at the nurse who took him back to his bed, she bowed and then took her leave shutting jinyoung hospital room door completely. Jinyoung stared up at the ceiling as the struggle to remember something, something that he felt was important.

“What am i forgetting?” he asked himself.

Jinyoung  turn to his side and notices a small grey camera that sat on the bedside table. with no hesitation he reach over to grab it. Carefully jinyoung open the side screen of the camera and press down on the power button. The screen flashed white followed by a simple tone; jinyoung lets out a sigh of relief. Thoroughly searching through the gallery Jinyoung smiled cherishing every single picture in the camera especially those of his friends who were smiling so sincerely. Looking at the photo made Jinyoung wonder about his friends, he wondered where they were at and why they weren’t here. A tear falls onto the screen, jinyoung blinks repeatedly as he touches his cheek.  _ I’m crying… why am i crying? _ The thought linger long this time. these happy photo manage to bring tears to his eyes but why? why did they bring this saddens this feeling of empty and lonely feeling in his chest. Suddenly jinyoung throat feels dry as he stumbles upon a video. Jinyoung hesitates, his finger ghosting over the play button over and over until finally he gives in and pressed play. The video start off with a black screen then the sound of people singing begins and Jinyoung couldn’t help but smile while watching it. 

He’s remember this, this was when they planned to do a road trip kinda planned but quickly became a trip to mark parent house in L.A. they decide to take the airplane because the drive over there would take forever. Jinyoung enjoyed watching the video of his friends and himself having fun and seeing them joking around in the van while JB snap at jackson and the maknaes for playing too much while he was driving few times made Jinyoung laugh harder. There a part in the video where they stop somewhere because youngjae really need to pee and couldn't hold it anymore. They stay a bit long then plan and play around like baseball and basketball, riding their bikes and racing each other every now and then before heading back into the van. They video seem to skip and start off with jackson filming in the plane. Jinyoung wasn’t so sure why he felt a tight knot in the center of his stomach, why the tears kept falling and why his head started throbbing while watching. Later into the video everyone throwing pillows at each other except himself, everyone shouting and laughing when suddenly it started. The sound of rumbling followed by the light flashing and the sound of Jackson mark bambam JB youngjae and Yugyeom voices. Jinyoung eyes widen the moment the sound of his friends screaming and shouting and  the pain and fear that heard through their voice that imprints in jinyoung mind. The video continued, as the screen shake and the emergency alarm begins to affect the audio causing it to glitch, the camera is flung and it hit against something before hitting the floor of the plane then it cuts off.  Jinyoung let’s go of the camera letting it fall onto his lap as both hands are covering his mouth, preventing any sound of his cries to escape his throat. But it hurt the dryness and tightness in his throat burned.  The sounds of their cry continued to ring in his ears made,  Jinyoung shut his eyes tightly but it was as if the scene was tattooed inside his eyelids for him to remember every time and it did it made him see it all over it again to picture it again and again.  It was to hard to bare, to much to hold back that it slipped and making this yelp sound followed by a stuttering intake of breath that soon creates this coughing like heart wrenching,suffocating and agonizing cry that escape and the horsy short rasped gasped that followed after every cry and  The tears that fell faster leaving stains behind.  Jinyoung gripped his throat as a burning scratching sensation was felt, his head throb, feeling like if his veins were ready to burst and his heart that pounding so hard felt like it was going to stop any moment now. 

Jinyoung leaped out of his bed and rushed towards the doorway and opening it roughly causing it to bounce back slowly. Jinyoung stop in the door as he look from left to right then took off running down the hallway pushing open the large doors and entering another section where was more like a room but this room was big with a desk that made a half circle that had people inside of it. Across from that was another hallway with no door on the other side of the room was another hallway this time there was a door; the two large swinging doors. Many people were there some sitting in the seat that where place next to the wall that face the information desk some people were dress the same as jinyoung other in casual clothing while doctors and nurse walk in and out and by. Jinyoung covered his ears blocking out the loud chattering that filled the air around the room and crouches.

The voice sip through becoming loud causing jinyoung to shout “stop it stop it! Shut up!” 

All eyes on him, every patient, visitor and nurse. Jinyoung stand up and runs over towards the information desk where two female nurse talked amongst themselves but stop the moment jinyoung approaches them. 

“Where are they?” 

The nurses look at each other then back at jinyoung a confused expression plastered on their face. Jinyoung slam his fist against the counter cause the paper and pens that laid there to shake and roll off, 

"Where are they!?" he shouted.

“Sir please calm down” the blonde nurse spoke with a hint of fear in her voice. 

“Just tell where the fuck are they!? Where are they?!” Jinyoung barks as he bang his fist harder. 

Jinyoung jumps up slightly the moment a hand is felt on his shoulder. “Sir, please calm down” the male nurse with a nametag that read chung. 

Jinyoung smack his arm away and grab a hold of the nurse by the collar of his shirt, the nurse grab jinyoung forearms as he tried to calm jinyoung down, advising him to release him from his hold. Jinyoung release his grip and took off running down the hall looking into every room shouting.

“Mark!” his voice shook

  


“Jackson!” it cracked.

  


“Youngjae!” he cried out

  


“Bambam!” tears began

  


“Yugyeom!” he shouted his voice lowering

  


Finally reach the last room and slide it open rushing into it as he cried out his voice straining “Jaebum hyung!” falling to his knees. 

He was back to his own room again, _“hyung!”_ he utters

“Where are you?”

  


Jinyoung pulled his knees close to his chest as he buried his face into them sobbing none stop. The nurse from before enters the room crouching down next to jinyoung rubbing his back as he comfort the crying lad. Jinyoung look up at nurse chung who gave him a sympathetic smile before pulling him to a hug. Jinyoung cried harder followed by  _ why god why  _ and  _ it’s not true please.  _

“Tell me they're okay?” jinyoung asked pulling away from the hug. 

The nurse looked down then back at jinyoung eyes filled with water, 

“Tell me where they are? Tell me they're okay!?” he cried

  


"where is who? Your friends?" a man asked walking into the room with a long white coat pressed stripe button up shirt and black slacks. 

Jinyoung quickly stood up and turn to face the doctor as he rushes over and grabbed a hold of the doctor coat, "please where are they? I need to know" he pleaded. 

The look of  of sympathy in the doctor eyes was present while looking at young man in front of him. The doctor grab a hold of jinyoung hand giving it a slight squeezed before letting out a sigh full with remorse and empathy. The doctor advise nurse chung to leave the room following behind him but stop in front of the doorway shutting it after chung exit. He approach jinyoung, who was more than ready to shake him for an answer. jinyoung growing dread for anything about his friends. But when the doctor hesitated and the lines on his face deepened. Jinyoung froze and the words sunk down into his chest.  the ‘i’m sorry’ that  followed choked his breath from his lungs. Jinyoung clinched his fist, his fingernails digging into his skin as each  gasp tore down his throat and his mind raced as he lost himself in the storm. Jinyoung shake his head he couldn’t accept this it couldn’t be true. No. they couldn't be gone. Jinyoung hissed a breath through clenched teeth. But every word that left the doctor lips made him lose strength in his legs and falling to ground. Jinyoung held back something between a sob and a shout. not knowing whether to be mad or to give up hope all together. 

After helping jinyoung stand back up and bring him to the bed the doctor bowed then exited the room giving jinyoung some time for himself. Jinyoung couldn't believe it-No. it that he didn't want to believe it but it was all true, everything, all of it. Jinyoung grabs the camera and held it close to his chest. Pulling it away he press play and a video begin.

_ "I~~ Love You~~ baby I~~" _

Jinyoung smiled but his smile was filled with sorrow and pain.

_ "Park jinyoung~!" _

Jinyoung sat the camera down while he let it play in the background as he hugged his knees and buried his face within them, breaking into tears as their laughter echoed.

  


“Jinyoung” a young man called 

Jinyoung look up to find wonpil who stood at the door entrance. Wonpil eyes avert towards the small camera that played then back at jinyoung. 

“Their gone” was all that was said  

  


Wonpil rushed to his side and pulled him into his embrace. It was painful to see jinyoung like this because he was never the type to cry or cry in front of others he always kept it all to himself. There wasn't much that  wonpil could do to help but to hold him tightly and let the torrent of jinyoung tears to soak his baby blue button up shirt. wonpil could feel jinyoung clench his fists and hear jinyoung silently screaming, suffocating with each breath he took. Wonpil ran his  fingers through jinyoung hair, in an attempt to calm the silent war within him.

_“I’ve lost them…_ ” he sobbed _“i’ve failed"_

_I'm alone_


	4. 7:47

**_Breaking news_ **

_ The news spread,  _ ****

 

**_JYP Boy Group-_ **

_ Like a wildfire _

 

**_JYP multinational boy group-_ **

_ Every radio station, _

 

**_Seem to have been involved in the plane accident-_ **

_ Every tv channel, _

 

**_JYP boy group got7 was involved in the plane crash._ **

_ Every Newspaper with the same headline _

 

**_Devastating news to all those who loved them and known these amazing talent boy’s and to their family._ **

_ Every social media with the news plastered in every news feed and timeline. _

 

**_Reports say that only one member-_ **

_ No matter where you turn or what channel you change it too it's there.  _

 

**_Breaking news the 7 member boy group got7 have seem to be involved in the plane crash, reporter have been informed that only one member-_ **

_ Every screen and station, all over social network,  _

 

**_Only one member was found-_ **

_ Day after day…. _

 

**_Breaking news jyp boy group got7 have been reported to be involved in the plane crash that was heading to Los Angeles reporter have been informed that only one member was found_ ** _ ,  _ **_The other 6 member are still missing…_ **

_ You just couldn't miss it….  _

 

**_Got7 have been reported to be involved in the plane crash only one member survived as for the 6 other member have not be found._ **

 

**_Report-_ **

**_Reporter everywhere-_ **

**_Breaking news-_ **

**_The other 6 member-_ **

**_The other 6 member’s body have not been reported found-_ **

**_Reporters say it most likely they did not survive the plane crash-_ **

**_Only one member of the group survived-_ **

**_Only one-_ **

**_Has survived-_ **

**_Park-_ **

**_Park-_ **

**_Park Jinyoung-_ **

**_Only one member was reported to survived the crash, Park jinyoung who is currently being treated at a hospital._ **

  
  


Everywhere Jinyoung went, the same thing everytime the same questions 

_ “do you know where your other band member could be?”  _

Mic after Mic,

_ “how do you feel knowing your band mate are dead?”  _

Question after question.

_ “what were you guys doing before the plane crash?”  _

Bright blinding white lights and group of news reporter crowding all around him, 

_ “are you going to visit your band mate family?”  _

It was suffocating,

_ “why were you guys heading to LA?”  _

 It was exhausting.

_ “how do you feel knowing you're the only one who alive?”  _

It was heartbreaking…

 

Just imagine walking out of the hospital after just being released and flashes of bright light and people pushing and shoving followed by loud voices and question that reminded you of the pain and sadness that you’ve lost almost every important part of your heart. Will that exactly what happen to Jinyoung, The very moment Jinyoung step out of the hospital doors he was greeted with news reporters that reminded him that now he is all alone.   

 

_ “Jinyoung, Jinyoung!”  _

No one by his sid _ e  _

_ “do you still plan to continue to sing and performing?”  _

No one to greet him when he goes home

_ “what are your future plans?”  _

No one to talk to when he feel like giving up

_ “Park Jinyoung what are you going to do now?” _

No one,

_ “Park jinyoung!”  _

Nothing 

_ “park jinyoung?“  _

_ “Park Jinyoung!”  _

_ “I want to go home” Jinyoung whisper under his breath.  _ As single tear escaped. 

And that all it took, one single tear to break free the rest falling behind it like a stream.. The crowded moved closer filming and capturing jinyoung as he cried uncontrollably, cornering the poor thing against the hospital wall. Jinyoung crouched down while using the sleeves of his large sweater to cover his face. The sound of the camera clicking and flashing and the chattering voices that over lapped each other echoed in jinyoung ears. The words hitting him like a hurricane.  _ “Jinyoung your member are dead how do you feel now?” follow by “what was your reaction knowing that you're the only one alive?”  _  but the one that hurt jinyoung the most the one that broke him and cause him to shout so agonizingly. 

 

_ “did you bother to save them?”  _

 

Jinyoung gasped as he struggled to stand up while holding onto the wall for support. His eyes reddened and swollen from all the crying and his lips now the color purple from biting down so hard on them. Jinyoung glared as his chest moved up and down while his breathing became heavy. 

“ _I_ -” he breathes “ _I-_ ” but the words refuse to form. 

Jinyoung tap his chest as if he was trying to calm himself. “I tried!” he cried out 

“I tried to call out to them!” he shouts followed by a sharp gasps “but i was late..i was too late” 

The clicking and voices soon come to an end leaving jinyoung in silence. 

“I couldn't save them! But! I tried! Damnit I tried!” jinyoung Barks, as he moves closer to the people. “I fucking _tried_! Do you hear me! I tried to save them!” 

There this hint of anger in jinyoung voice and this burning passion and hatred and self hate sparking in his eyes as he glared at each and every camera. Jinyoung points at the reporter who ask him the question and begin to walk closer.

“ _I.Tried_. _To_. _Save_. _them_.!” said jinyoung in between his teeth. 

“But i failed” jinyoung stop mid way 

“I _failed_ ”

“I'm alone” he falls to his knees sobbing hysterically 

 

Silence fills the air again and the only sound came from the clicking of the cameras. No question no words of comfort nothing but clicking and jinyoung cries were heard. No moment later  A arm is being placed around Jinyoung waist and he being lifted up off his feets; a cover is placed over his head, and a heavy deep voice shouts _ “Move aside” _ as they continue to carry jinyoung.  the voices began again But jinyoung could barely comprehend half of the thing they spurt out. The sound of his own suffocating cries block it out and his hot breath making him dizzy under the sheet, it felt like in any moment now he was going to pass out due to all the crying and all the energy he used up after just being released. _ “Move aside!”  _ a husky voice shouts _ “get out of the way!” _ they bark and The van door pops open and jinyoung is placed inside of it but the moment the door slam close jinyoung swear he heard a familiar voice. A voice that nearly made him jump up and off his seat. 

 

_ “Please get on”  _

 

Jinyoung sit up straight and yacks off the cover from his head. 

“Some people can be so inconsiderate, i mean dude how are you gonna corner the poor guy like that” said jackson looking over his shoulder from the passenger seat. 

“Their news reporter, they don't care if the person is choking as long as they get what they need to get paid.” said Mark who was seating on the seat next to Jinyoung. 

“Right! Blood sucking leeches that what they are just saying” 

“That enough yugyeom shut up” JB  exclaimed from the driver seat.   
  


youngjae scoot up from the back seat and placing his hand on jinyoung shoulder. Jinyoung flinched from his sudden touch.”you alright jinyoung hyung?”

“We heard you were coming home today and thought wouldn’t it be better if we came for you instead of manager nim?” youngjae adds,

“Yeah, seeing how you must be _exhausted_ and stuff” bambam blurted out in a sarcastic tone

Mark punched bambam on the shoulder “Sorry jinyoungie i tried to leave them behind, anyways how you feeling?” he asked 

 

Jinyoung stared at soft slim hand that was resting on his forearm that was now being removed and leaving this cold and lonely feeling in return. Jinyoung eyes followed Mark hand then look up at elder boy then over at Yugyeom who was sitting behind Mark. His eyes soon avert over to youngjae who sat behind his seat. He was smiling, a beaming smile that brought along this type of warmth with it. 

Jinyoung eyes moved from youngjae to bambam who was giggling at somethings on his phone then over to Jackson who was looking over his own shoulder. Jinyoung stop and stared at the rear view mirror that had JB reflection. 

“Is everything okay jinyoung?” Mark asked with a hint of concern in his voice. 

“ _Yeah_ , it just” jinyoung sighs “i thought… “ the word are caught in his throat, “i thought _you_ _were all_...”

JB look at Mark with the same facial expression a confused yet worried look.

“We were what?” ask Jackson

Jinyoung chuckled lightly while looking down and fidgeting with his own fingers “nothing, forget”

  
  


“ _Jinyoung_ , Jinyoung!” 

Jinyoung looks up his eyes widen as he look around himself frantically, the seat next to him is suddenly empty. 

“Jinyoung, are you okay?” wonpil asked 

Jinyoung shake his head “he was just here _…”_

Wonpil reach over towards jinyoung, moving over to the seat next to him.  Jinyoung yanks his arm away from wonpil while staring at him with so much confusion.

“Hey bro are you alright man?”

Jinyoung turn his attention towards the passenger seat. 

“J- _Ja_ -jae” jinyoung uttered, his breathing becoming uneven.

Jinyoung quickly turn around to find dowoon sitting where bambam was sitting and sungjin where youngjae was at and young.k where yugyeom was sitting. Jinyoung look at the rear view mirror and to his disappointment is wasn't JB instead it was his manager.  

“Where did they go?” 

“Where did who go jinyoung?” ask wonpil

“They where just here!” jinyoung shouted 

“Jinyoung calm down please” said sungjin, noticing the way jinyoung breathing start to quicken. 

“They where just here! I saw them!” 

“Jinyoung! Listen to me” shouted wonpil,

grabbing onto jinyoung shoulder and shaking him lightly and staring into jinyoung eye intensively. 

There a moment of silence before wonpil break it with a heavy sigh, he gulps “ jinyoung ah... “ he hesitates “they weren’t here with you, do you understand me?” 

“You're lying!” 

“They are _dead_ jinyoung! Their gone! OKAY! _their gone_!” wonpil emphasizes, 

“but they-" 

“I'm sorry” wonpil cut jinyoung off. 

Jinyoung falls back against his seat in defeat, his shoulder slouching, his arms falling to his side as he let out a sorrowful cry. For moment there jinyoung felt hopefully, for moment he thought he awaken from some nightmare. no one said anything, they all watch as jinyoung cried the whole way back to JYPE building. Wonpil from time to time rubbing jinyoung shoulders and whispering words of comfort every now and then.

After arriving  everyone expect jinyoung got off. Wonpil insisted to ride back to the dorm with jinyoung but sungjin refused saying it be best to give jinyoung some space to take it all in. Some alone time and space to breathe.  Everyone said their goodbye, wonpil taking the longest, telling jinyoung to stay strong before closing the door. Wonpil watched as the black van vanished in the distance before heading inside.  

 

The ride back was quiet and the seat that were once filled with warm presences are now empty.  Jinyoung rest his head against the tinted windows watching as each car pass by and the city light that slowly began to glow as the sun started to set. Moment like these were jinyoung favorite because it was the usually the time when everyone was heading back home from another fan sign or some fun event. Mark would usually be listening to his music or watching some overwatch videos on youtube while jackson start to complain about something or tell a funny story that would get bambam and yugyeom hyper. JB would be slowly falling asleep until youngjae sudden burst of laughter causing everyone to jump and turn their attention to him. Youngjae was always so joyful jinyoung love that about him even though youngjae struggle and always second guess himself he always had a smile on his face. Jackson too, he would be this full of confidence type of guy on camera but when all the camera are off jackson show his true self this guy with low self esteem and sentimental kind hearted person who never think he good enough and judges himself so much. Jinyoung appreciated the younger members too, They were the loudest, the ones to always lighten the mood to hype everyone up when it get quiet or dual. But they would get out of control at time and that when JB would step in and calm them down. God jinyoung miss them so much. everything, every small thing just about them, he miss it. He miss them so much that anything would remind jinyoung of them a certain smell or object and a certain song on the radio that played would make him think of them and all the fun memories they had. Jinyoung felt like complete crap. He wanted to wake up from his nightmare again to open his eyes and find them all beside him again. “ _Please come back to me_ ” jinyoung sob while gripping tightly onto the items wonpil handed him before leaving. 

Jinyoung step out of the van and looks up at the building in front of him. It was quiet… Jinyoung remember how every time he’d get back to the dorm late, the light from their apartment window was always the only one on at 2am in the morning. How every time they’d get back from recording or filming something it would always be loud with bambam and yugyeom shouting something ridiculous and jackson complaining about something and mark yelling at them for being too loud and not letting him sleep on the drive back. While JB raced into the building. As for youngjae he would either stay over or walk back to his place that wasn't so far from.their dorm.

“I miss them” jinyoung whispered tears threatening to escape. 

 

Jinyoung walked into the building and Just like earlier it was quiet. It was also quiet while waiting for the elevator and It was quiet while he walk down the narrow hallway too.  Jinyoung never knew how much he hated the quiet until now. Jinyoung sigh heavily while locking the front door. A creaking sound was made as he pushed open the wooden door, Jinyoung wasn’t sure why he was hoping that the moment he open the door he would be greeted with smiling faces and loud voices, a room full of people he loved so deeply and the smell of ramen. 

“I’m _home_ …” jinyoung whispered under his breath as he walked in. 

_ Nothing  _

Nothing but an empty room and darkness, no body was here, no body not even JB cats. Everything was left the same just like the night before they had taken off  for their road trip. Jinyoung walked into the empty apartment leaving the light off as he made his way to the kitchen. His finger glide across the table and counter, reminiscing every precious memory he had here. how every dirty dish and every empty space had a sweet memory with it. How every door that lead into a bedroom had a story to tell and how every single one of those memories brought him an enormous amount of pain to his chest. Jinyoung walk back into the living room and sat down on the couch that face the front door. 

 

_ “Hello! I’ve arrived! With coco!”  _

 

Jinyoung chuckled to himself as he started remembering when youngjae would come over which was every time after moving out, and how he’d always make an entrance. Honestly it didn't even seem like youngjae ever moved out considering how he was always at the dorm and would always head back with them to the dorm after every filming and recording too. Jinyoung didn’t mind it though youngjae was always so cheerful it was good having him around and he’d bring food too.. 

Jinyoung stood up from his seat and walk over towards the clothing on the floor and began to pick up each shirt carefully while smiling yet tears still sliding down his colorless cheeks. Jinyoung crouched down as he continued to fold the clothing and hugging them tightly before getting back up and headed towards the only bed room with the door open. It was Jackson room it was also a mess in it clothing everywhere. Jinyoung carefully walk towards the bed and stared at it while holding onto something and staring at it with so much longing in his eyes then placing it onto the mattress. Memories raced into the back of Jinyoung mind, these good moment with jackson all coming back while he stared at the item on the mattress. Though he never like admit Jinyoung admire jackson because  he was always able to show his true feeling so naturally and how everyone seem to get along with him so easily.

Jinyoung step out of jackson room and went into the room across from it. Jinyoung turn the doorknob carefully waiting for the  clicking sound to be  made before opening it slowly. Peeking his head inside, Unlike jackson room this one was a bit more clean still unorganized but the clothing wasn't all over the floor.  jinyoung walk over towards the mattress and sat down patting the mattress then look over at the desk that had a computer on top of it and some other junk around it. Mark ate a lot of junk yet still stayed in shape. Jinyoung admire that about mark.  Jinyoung stood up and placed a triangle like shape onto mark pillow then exit the room and entered the room next to it. This room had two beds and it was the biggest in the in dorm. It was Yugyeom and bambam room surprisingly it was clean but then again they did clean it before they all left. Jinyoung patted bambam pillow then left a necklace on it followed by yugyeom then went into JB room. His heart felt tight the moment  he spots  the stupid bucket hat jb love to wear resting on the bed. Jb must have forgotten it while rushing everyone out of the dorm that one night. Jinyoung sat on JB bed and held the hat close to his chest. 

“I miss you, so much” he sobbed _“i’m so sorry_ ” Jinyoung whispered after leaving the hat and a necklace next to it on the bed. 

Lastly he walked into his own room like always it was clean and neatly fixed jinyoung fell onto his bed shoving his face into the pillows as he let out the muffled cries, letting his tears stain the pillow along with his bed sheet as he pulled onto them and wrap himself in them. Jinyoung digged into his pocket and pulled out his and youngjae necklaces, holding them up into the air as he smiled with a hint of sadness. 

 

_ “This one this one!” bambam exclaimed  _

_ “Wow that awesome bro!” yugyeom chirped giving bambam a thumb up _

_ “How about something like this instead guy's?” Mark suggest pointing at these triangle shapes objects inside a glass case.  _

_ Youngjae tilt his head to side a bit “hmm…”  _

_ “Hyung you want triangle as our friendship necklace?” said yugyeom  _

_ Mark turn around and pushed yugyeom away causing the youngin to stumble, “no, i was thinking made we can all get one and engrave something into it”  _

_ “Oh like something meaningful to each of us?” jackson join in cheerfully  _

_ “Like something alike or different hyung?” ask youngjae still looking at the triangles.  _

_ “Something that define each one of us” said mark _

_ “So like different?” bambam questioned “yes bambam” mark responded slightly annoyed.  _

_ Jinyoung chuckled “i like that idea Mark”  _

_ “Me too” said JB who already looking for picture of what he want his necklace to have.  _

_ “Hyung what are you getting on yours?” asked youngjae  _

_ “A palm tree. You?”  _

_ “The number 3 with ars on the side of it and in it but little” youngjae replied _

_ “What about you yugyeom?”  asked youngjae  _

_ “I’m getting a dandelion on mine but i’ll be using the one that i drew for the design”   _

_ “I’m getting the chinese character that means wang on mine”  _

_ “I’m going to get  a snake on mine” said bambam _

_ “Why? Is it because your  fake” said jinyoung while giving his customization to the designer.  _

_ “No! I’m getting it because   _ _ the word "snake" in korean is pronounced baem”  _

_ “I mean I wouldn’t know that bam it's not like i’m korean…” jinyoung responds sarcastically.  _

_ “You know hyung i don’t appreciate your sarcasm”  _

_ “Well bam i don't appreciate half of the thing you do and say”  _

_ “Ooh!” chants yugyeom followed by jackson and youngjae  _

_ “Anyways! It's gonna be a snake with the color of the thailand flag”   _

_ “I’m getting my birth year” mark stated  _

_ “Hyung that lame” declared youngjae  _

_ “Your lame youngjae”  _

_ “I know” said youngjae who later burst out laughing  _

_ “How are you going to have it made Mark hyung?” asked jinyoung  _

_ Mark pulled out his phone and showed them a picture of how he wanted his to be made “ this Roman numeral means 93.”  _

_ “Ooh~” yugyeom and youngjae awed in a unison _

_ “How about you jinyoungie?” ask marked  _

_ “I’m getting a phrase engraved it's a motto i’ve liked for quite a long time”  _

_ “What motto is that hyung?” asked youngjae  _  
  


 

Jinyoung stared at his necklace that hangs alongside with youngjae from his hand. 

“Can’t take it when i’m gone” he whispered

Before pulling the necklaces close to his chest. 

Jinyoung curled up into a fetal position tears falling from the side of his eyes crying silently in his room until falling into a deep sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I add their 7for7 into this mixture of concept. But after this it will be based off my imagine and plot of plot. I hope you enjoy remember to comment kudo or whatever.


	5. You are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if there some mistakes. But I hope you enjoy I was trying to update this chapter as fast as possible since it overdue. 
> 
> Comment and let me know what you think also remember to like it and share it with other too.

_ Jinyoung gazed at the ocean, watching as the water dance in such a rhythmic manner. The cold breeze brushing his gentle cheeks as a greeting of comfort while he rested against the rail of the peer, sitting just at the edge of the bridge. His legs dangled back and forth, his slim long finger fidgeting with the necklace in his hands. He stare at it for a minute or less, caressing every edge and surface, tracing it as if his finger will somehow help him see every little detail in the necklace.  _

  
  


_ Jinyoung Enjoyed the silence that surrounded him, that wrapped around him like a blanket. Enjoyed The way the wind whistle, how it  whispered sweet nothing-ness to the tree as it played along each branch as it flows ever so calmly. _

  
  


_ jinyoung eyes gentle begin to shut as he listen to the sound of water and wind playing. The beautiful rhyme that they made, so soothing so calming. It was like lullaby, a harmonizing song; almost like a hum. _

  
  


_ no- wait it was a hum. There was humming, a sweet humming that cause the wind  to dance along its choreographer and followed the waves tempo. Jinyoung eyes opened as he listen enduringly to soothing sound of a voice angelic humming.   _

_ The voice was mesmerizing, absolutely gorgeous. A voice so unique it's pleasing to the human ear, so lovely it could possibly curable the broke soul. Jinyoung knows that tone of voice anywhere and oh how much he miss it, how much He longed so desperately to hear that voice again.  _

 

_ Jinyoung turned around and stared deeply into the frost. Analyzing every tree and Bush, every exotic plant and ever vine that dangled. _

 

_ Jinyoung roses to his feet, hesitantly and cautiously began to walk towards the frost. The close he got the louder the humming was heard. Jinyoung glide his fingertips against every tree trunk. Touched every rose that bloomed, Taking in every part of this forest. It was beautiful, how Every exotic plant had a different shade of color and how every leaf that fell to his feet was shaped differently. Most of all how the sunlight peak into the trees, give it this mystical atmosphere and scenery.  _

  
  


_ Jinyoung pauses, eyes locked onto this triangle shape building. the build almost resembles a large pyramid The building sat there alone in this wide open space. Nothing around it to steal away its spotlight. Jinyoung was so focus on the building design that he hadn't notice the tall young man, with fade baby blue  hair.  _

 

_ Jinyoung eyes avert toward the young man. His eyes growing wide and teary as he watches the familiar man in front of him.   _

 

_ “Bambam” Jinyoung wanted to utter but the words refuse to leave.  _

 

_ Bambam eyes never meet Jinyoung, his head never turn to face him. He stood there, hands down by his side, Face forward and his side view was all that jinyoung could see.  _

 

_ Jinyoung notice the way bambam hand was balled up. He notice the chain that wraps around his wrist and palm. The way he grip it with some type of reassurance, or force.  _

 

_ ‘is that?’ jinyoung wonders, looking down at the necklace in his hand. _

 

_ Bambam loosen his fist and a triangle shape necklace drops down and dangles, allowing the ray of the sun to shine against its golden frame.  _

 

_ Jinyoung eyes quickly avert towards the necklace he held in his hands. to was same necklace shape as bambam, only inside of the frame was different design. Bambam necklace had different linings, has for jinyoung, the lining inside the frame face another direction.  _

 

_ Could it be? A puzzle piece, that'll answer the question that lies within Jinyoung heart? _

 

_ Jinyoung slowly looked up towards bambam still standing in the same spot. Only this time bambam watched him from the corner of his eye.  _

  
  


_ Was he trying to tell Jinyoung something?  _

 

_ ‘bambam-’  _

 

_ Jinyoung attempt to call him, But bambam quickly turn away and walked into the building. Vanishing from Jinyoung sight.  _

 

_ Jinyoung quickly began to follow but the moment he enter the building he was met with nobody but the empty room and old halls.  _

 

_ He was alone again, no one to greet him but the mellowing humming that only grow louder the deeper Jinyoung went into the building. Jinyoung breath In deeply before continuing to cautiously roamed the empty corridor. Listening carefully to the humming.  _

  
  


_ There was this large open view above the main room. Right in the center where a large circle was placed with strange design dance around the floor. The rooftop was completely gone, allowing the sun to burn down into the building. But it appeared as if the building was built this way just for the sun, the large circle shape opening above appeared to be an entrance for the sun. Allowing it to glow as it golden rays. Give it this shadowy appearance around the room.  _

 

_ Yugyeom stood in the center where the design formed into a circle, his yellow hair matching the sun color. Yugyeom tilt his head back, bring his forearm over his head, blocking the blinding sun from straining his eyes as he watches the wide open area. You could see each floor lapping over each other, going higher and higher as if they swirled upwards toward the sun or gate to heaven door. So mesmerized and enchanted by its brightness Yugyeom reach out toward it as  the chain wrapped around his hand that glisten. Yugyeom extended his arm more, the way his arm reach toward the sun appeared as if he was gifting the necklace to the sun, baring his chain to it as a welcoming gift. The sound of the humming allow itself into his ear, bring this sudden relaxation to the boy as he shut his eyes breathing in slowly as he slowly drop his arm to his side. When opening his eyes, he spot another boy, who looking down at him from the railing of the wall. The young man make eyes contact with yugyeom before walking away and vanish into the hallway. _

  
  


_ Youngjae watched the way yugyeom appreciated the sun, he watch the young boy who appeared graceful. His feature slightly difficult for him to see as he watched him from the 7th floor. He meet yugyeom eyes the moment they open, no word exchanged no facial expressions was given, Nothing but silence. Youngjae turn away the moment yugyeom began to step back, drifting into the building as youngjae walks away from the ledge of the barrier and proceed to explore the large building. Looking into every room but finding nothing in particular. Exhaustion grow on him, leaning his back against the wall as his head rested on the ledge of the window. His soft brown hair the fell perfectly and split evenly in the middle. The way his chest moved up and down gently. His eyes gentle watches the objects in his hand, taking in every feature. Memorizing every curve and edge, every scrape and dent. Youngjae quickly shut his eyes for a few minutes before pushing himself off wall and continued to walk up the stairs.  _

  
  


_ Jinyoung walked around the building but comes to q stop as he pass the the main room, his heart began to pound rapidly against his chest. turning back jinyoung looking inside, he swore he saw him, even if it was a brief second Yugyeom was there. _

 

_ Slowly he begins to run, quickly picking up his pace as he looked into different rooms of the building searching desperately for the young boy. Going around and around, from floor to floor, claiming up each flight of stairs nearly jumping over every other step. His heart wouldn’t slow down, his mind wouldn’t shut up as his mouth grow drier from how harsh he was breathing. _

 

_ Jinyoung knees tremble, his legs weakening causing him stumbles but he doesn’t stop. Jinyoung refuse to let himself fall, his body ache and every muscle in his legs crying in pain, begging for mercy but jinyoung did allow himself to stop. Not until his legs finally give out on him, causing him to fall forward.  _

 

_ Jinyoung breathing grow hollow; trying so desperately to push himself up but failed repeatedly as his arms trembled. It was pointless, he tried and tried but his body only continued to grow heavier and weaker. His vision grow hazy as he rolled onto his back. _

 

_ Bring the necklace upwards he watches it as it dangles effortlessly, trying to calm down as everything around him begins to fade in and out. The necklace sparked, a blue like light spark from around it. Jinyoung blinks once but his vision stay a blur, twice then three time but nothing. The fourth time he held his eyes shut tightly and when he open them, there stood a young man right on top of the stairway staring out from the large wide window, his forearm resting on the ledge of the window. In his hands was the same triangle necklace that face the sun.  _

 

_ Jinyoung pushes himself up slowly, eyes locked onto the back of the young man that stared deeply into the triangle shape object in his hand. The boy with brown hair that parted in the middle as it rested gracefully against his rosy cheeks turn around, leaning his back against the wall as the light of the sun almost made him appear like an angel. The young boy eyes slowly shut, his head tilting back as he inhaled deeply. His eyes slowly drop down at the necklace in his palm, sadeness surrounded him. Loneliness made its appearance as it rested upon the young lad shoulders.   _

_ Jinyoung watched: he watched the way youngjae brought his hand up, how he gently and adoringly yet sadly gazed at necklace before dropping it back down to his side and shoving it into his pocket as he toss his head back.  _

  
  


_ Jinyoung tries to move in closer to youngjae, his legs still shaking as he claims the stairs. Youngjae push himself off the wall and look over at jinyoung, but not a single word was said. Youngjae continued up the next flight if stairs and into another floor. Jinyoung follows him, watching him as he continued to walk all around. It almost appears as if they were walking in a circle passing by the same doors and rooms. But they weren't, to jinyoung surprise they seem to be moving downwards.  _

 

_ Youngjae begin to pick up his pace, his head hang low as his eyes stayed glue to the ground. Jinyoung follow right behind him, watching intensely at the boy who walked next to the short wall, his hand gliding against the railing of the ledge.  _

 

_ Youngjae turn to face Jinyoung causing him to stop in his tracks. Youngjae walks up towards a door, walking right in but before he does he eyes stayed lock on jinyoung as if warning him, telling him to not follow. Then proceed and shut the door behind himself.  _

 

_ But jinyoung doesn't listen, quickly he rushes towards the door and swing it open with so much force but only to find nothing but an empty room. _

  
  
  


_ Youngjae walked closer towards the gates window, where there stood Yugyeom his arm resting against the railing as he looked at every building. Youngjae stood there staring out at the same view as yugyeom. Looking at every building how the all were of different sizes, height and shapes. But it was all the same nothing change. Youngjae turns around and looks back at the door that lead him here.  _

  
  


_ Jinyoung grow worryingly as he continued to explore the building as he continued to follow the humming outside, where the sun has seem to set and darkness has taken over.  _

 

_ He wasn't at the same place anymore, somehow he was in the city.  The large tall apartments that appeared force against each other as the moon luminous the street, the way some street light flickered as the quiet night listen gracefully to the humming. Jinyoung notice.  a man, squatting as he fidget with the triangle shape necklace in his hands. _

 

_ Jinyoung squints his eyes as if it’ll help him see better, while walking towards the lad.  _

 

_ “J-jackson?” jinyoung said under his breath.  _

 

_ Jackson eyes slightly shut as he took in the lonely night sky and listening to the sound of the calming voice before rising to his feet. jackson into an ally where there hanged a bird cage with a small baby bird. Jackson grazed the bird cage slightly as he  continued to walk, he stops in front of a broken mirror, staring at his reflection. There was this resentment in his eyes. The way he stared at his own reflect as if the person in front of him was someone else. Someone he doesn't know anymore.  _

 

_ the lonely street of Hong Kong brought this sadness, how every street sign that flickers. The way Cars parked everywhere, left alone, or abandoned. How lights shining in different color and signs from stores flickering and buzzing.  _

 

_ Jackson turn his head slight as if he was waiting for someone.  _

 

_ Jinyoung follow jackson, watching the lad as he made his way towards the streets but stop When he spot another familiar boy, in the other side of the street with red hair.  Jinyoung turns to see jackson has disappeared and makes his way towards Mark who is gazing at every building around them. The closer Jinyoung get, he start to notice something in the Mark hand. He was holding onto the same necklace everyone else had. _

 

_ Jinyoung watches Mark, taking in every part of him. He looks the same, his oval shape eyes, pure black and calm. His full lips perfectly shape like a doll. His high cheekbones and sharp jawline. His long neck and slim small shoulders. His fragile frame yet wide back that face jinyoung. He wanted to hug Mark, to wrap his arm around that small thin waist of his. To rest his cheek against that back of his. To hear that contagious laugh of his. A laugh so unique and baby like, it bring warmth into the pit of your heart.  _

 

_ Mark begins to walk as jinyoung follows from  behind When suddenly Jinyoung hears the sound of footsteps against the ground coming closer. No moment later bambam walked out of an alley. as he moves close to Mark, side by side they walked down the quiet path. Mark and Bambam turn a corner and are met with a big street full of cars and lights and right in the center of this large road stood jackson waiting for them. Jackson turn around to face in front of himself as he continued to walk. As Mark and bambam walked right beside him.  _

 

_ The humming got louder as they continued to walk forward. The street light got brighter and somehow Jinyoung notice the way Mark would turn slight towards Jinyoung. Jinyoung eyes begin to blur, causing jinyoung to panic slightly. Blinking his eye repeatedly when suddenly Yugyeom and youngjae walked out from a building side by side. Walking right past Jinyoung.  _

 

_ The humming slowly turned deafening, jinyoung could hear his own breathing as he gripped tightly his chest and falling to his knees as he sob desperately. Jinyoung hate this, why was this happening to him? Why was it getting so hard for him to breath?  _

 

_ Jinyoung gasped for air as he look up towards his member but there didn't stop, they continued to walk, getting further and further away.  _

 

_ “st-sto-p” he gasped “don't-”   _

 

_ jinyoung wheezed as his lung felt as if they were being crushed and squeezed. A feeling that almost felt as if water was filling into your lung and your drowning and no matter how fast you swim up towards the surface it appear as if you weren't moving at all.  _

 

_ Jinyoung vision fade in and out, the building seem to tilt forward, the ground began to move in waves and in that moment he swears he notice his members turn to look at him with this look of sympathy.  _

 

_ Why were they doing this? He wonder  _

 

_ “le-ave m-" he grasped _

  
  


_ It was this empty, it felt so cold but there was humming again. Jinyoung eyes opened, he was meet with a dark clear night sky and building light from a far and a ocean splitting him away from the city.  _

 

_ In the water was a boat floating there, unmoved as it was tied to the dock. Jinyoung step back, but his hand still holding onto the rail. Jinyoung breathe in deeply, taking in the sight before him. _

 

_ “I can breath again” He say to himself  _

  
  


_ The humming suddenly was heard again But this time jinyoung could hear it right beside him. When jinyoung looked to his side, there he stood. Back against the railing, humming a sweet melody as he let the necklace rattle against the rail. Jinyoung eyes become watery, his heart felt as if it was being mended together. He couldn't believe his eyes.  _

 

_ “Hyung…” Jinyoung utters. _

 

_ Jeabeom turn to face Jinyoung, as a smile spreads across his face. His arm reaching out towards him, pulling jinyoung into  his embrace. Jinyoung let out tears, crying out words like “I miss you" and “I can't do this with you" followed by “I need you"  over and over.  _

 

_ Jaebeom patted jinyoung head as a small chuckled left his lips.  _

 

_ The moon watches the two as silence fills the night sky. Jinyoung sniffed and hic as Jaebeom caress his hair.  _

 

_ “bbeom-”Jinyoung sobbed _

 

_ “shhh,” Jaebeom hush the crying boy, _

 

_ comforting him as he began to hum once again. Jinyoung wrapped his arm around Jaebeom torsos.  _

 

_ Jaebeom pulled away from jinyoung and smiled gentle at the younger lad “Nyoungie” jaebeom whispers. _

 

_ “Just like now, you" said jinyoung looking warming into Jaebeom eyes. “just stay beside me” _

 

_ The smile on jaebeom face quickly vanish as he pulls Jinyoung closer, Jinyoung buries his face against Jaebeom chest.  _

 

_ “it’s your existence that keeps me breathing” breathing” jaebeom whispers.  _

 

_ Everything comes rushing, it as if the scenery is being rewind or ripped apart and jinyoung ie yanked away from Jaebeom embrace. It like a old videotape being fast forward. The film slowly burning. As it is being destroyed forever. Just like the way Jinyoung heart was.  _

  
  


Jinyoung eyes shoot open, his breathing was rough as he held onto his chest. His body was drenched in sweat as he breathed in heavy. Jinyoung body felt paralyzed, his leg refuse to move and his arm felt like someone was holding them down. Jinyoung toss his head from side to side, as every little thing could be heard, the sound of the cars passing by, the birds chirping and his own difficult breathing. 

 

“eo-eomma!” Jinyoung cried out, trying desperately to catch his breath. “eomma!!” 

 

Jinyoung shoulder grow heavy, as if someone was holding onto them. Pressing his body deeper into the mattress, like a nightmare or a freddy Crocker movie, where the guy is being suck Into the mattress slowly and no matter how much he tries to hold onto something. The boy continues to be pulling into the center of his bed. That what if felt like for jinyoung. 

 

“Jinyoung-ah!, jinyoung-ah! Wake up!” shouted wonpil as he gently shook the boy by his shoulder. 

 

Jinyoung shot up from his bed, inhaling sharply as he grasp for dear life. Everything felt so real, their touch, his voice, their smile and even the way they all looked at jinyoung. But just like every nightmare, just like every dream he has. He always wake up to reality. To the fact of  them all being gone. Ever since that day he got back from the hospital. Jinyoung hasn't left his dorm, He refuse to leave, even when wonpil begs him and telling him how it would do him good. But Jinyoung just couldn't find any reason to wake up, to crawl out of bed and get dress, to even breath or eat. These past 2 weeks have only gotten harder for jinyoung. It gotten to the point that JY Park had order jinyoung to go back home to his family for the time being.

 

So Today was the last day of jinyoung stay at the dorm, and no matter how much jinyoung begged to stay. JY Park already had his mind set and there was no way of changing it. 

 

Jinyoung sat in the same spot, knees up to his chest as his arm wrapped around them. 

 

Wonpil patted jinyoung back, listening as the lad begin to cry again. “Did you dream of them again?” ask wonpil

 

Jinyoung buried his face into his knees, nodding his head up and down. Wonpil let out a small sigh. “I know its hard for you to let go of them jinyoungie, but you need to understand that it's time to let go” 

 

Jinyoung lifted his head, “i can’t” he uttered, staring at the ending of his bed where there laid every single one of their matching necklaces.

 

“Yes you can jinyoung, you just have to stop staying in this apartment” 

 

“No, you don’t understand.” jinyoung shouted  as he turned to face wonpil

 

“What part of this don’t i understand?” 

 

“I don’t know how to explain it to you, but i can’t let go wonpil!” 

 

Wonpil raked his finger through his hair, standing up from the mattress. “Look jinyoung, we need to pack up already. Jyp already sent the moving guys so we don't have enough time” he explained

 

“I can't leave!” jinyoung shouted 

 

“You have no choice jinyoung!” 

 

“please! Tell him I did already, tell him how if i leave this place i won't be able to live anymore!” jinyoung cried  hysterically. 

 

Wonpil watched as jinyoung broke down his begged him and gripped onto his hand with so much force as he cried endlessly. 

 

“jinyoung-ah" he ushers, as he caress jinyoung hand, “we are trying to help you" 

 

“I don’t need anyone to help! I don’t need you!” jinyoung exclaimed, smacking away wonpil hand, as his shoulder stiff. 

 

“I don't care whether you think you don't jinyoung! I am not letting you starve yourself to death! Damnit i won't end up losing you too!” said wonpil, in a firm tone of voice.  

  
  


Jinyoung shoulder loose up, his gaze became gentle as he watch the man in front of him break down in tears. Jinyoung didn’t notice, he hadn't realize how strong wonpil had been for the both of them.  when this must have been as hard on him as it is for jinyoung. 

 

“Your not the only one who miss them jinyoung!” 

 

Jinyoung slide to the edge of his bed moving closer to wonpil who eyes shut tight. 

 

“I knew them too damnit!” wonpil utter his voice breaking “They where my friend to!” 

 

Jinyoung reach out and grab a hold of wonpil hands. “Wonpil-”

 

“ Do you know how much sungjin cries at night!” asked wonpil 

 

Jinyoung eyes look down at the ground as he shake his head no. 

  
  


“you weren't the only one who was close to Jb! Jinyoung!” 

 

“wonpil-" 

  
  


“He cries at night saying how he wishes he could help you more because he know how much your suffering! Damnit!” 

 

“wonpil-" 

 

“You are the reason why he is still holding up! Why he tries to be strong!” 

 

“Wonpil..”

 

“You are the thin thread that is keeping everyone live jinyoung!” 

 

“please” jinyoung sobs 

  
  


“You are everybody lost hope,” said wonpil, tears streaming down his cheeks, “ you are the one who will carry their memories. How do you expect your fans to carry on if you can't? ” wonpil cries 

 

“Don’t leave me too jinyoung please” 

 

i’m sorry” cried jinyoung as he held wonpil into his arms.

 

The day went by faster then expected. Jinyoung last thing had been loaded into the moving truck. Jinyoung looked out from the living room window as the truck drove off. The now empty apartment felt colder. Not a single trace of any one was left behind. All their things were packed up and being shipped to their family as a remind of them. It's harder, after losing someone and seeing the only thing you have left of them being take away from you. It only make it harder, because now you can finally see it, the reality of the fact that Their really gone. It hit you, like a bolder smashing into a wall. It breaks you, shatters you into millions of pieces unable to pick up and rebuild because some part of you have been destroyed into dust. It take months, years in fact to truly ever accept it. And although there will be things that remind you of them. The smallest of things and it’ll break you. It'll hurt you and you'll blame yourself, as if you had any power in choosing whether they live or don't. But you never had the choice,and in the end, you weren't at fault and there was nothing you could have done to save them. But it hurts, and it'll always hurt. 

 

Jinyoung entered each empty room, taking in the old memory of them. Remembering the visit to jackson hometown. How they ran around a mall going up and down the escalator. When they filmed their music video their and how beautiful the view was from the rooftop. How they all left without telling Jb.

  
  


“Jinyoung, come on let's go. “ said wonpil by the front door, 

 

Jinyoung nod his head, “i'll meet you down there” 

 

Jinyoung took one last moment to take it all in ”Goodbye” was all he could utter as he pulled his hoodie over his head and shut the door behind him. Leaving behind their memories. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You made it to the end! What do you think? Please remember to subscribe and give me your thought.
> 
> And yes I am gonna be using the You Are era and soon Look era. They gave me idea that I did have trouble writing it all out. 
> 
> Again thank you for reading my story and check out the rest of my story too. 
> 
> Sorry if this chapter to long or to short.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!! ^u^ this is my first time writing on here so i hope i did good. i wrote this story and published it on vingle and wattpad. But not all because if writer block.
> 
> anyways I'm thinking of using this site now to publish my other fan fiction that i need to re-read them again and fix the error And misspell. 
> 
> also this was inspired by the flight log trilogy and i hope i did good TT.TT 
> 
> um sorry for any mistake and bad grammar. i'm not the best in that... i have dyslexia so I tended to mix some word or number around.  
> And sorry for updating the same chapter it just I find some mispells I don't edit anything or the plot so enjoy.


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